Relationships Don't Go Well Sometimes..

It's good enough to keep girls talking as long as there are some sweets and drink. Today, I went to meet my friends from high school. We ordered some sweets and drink bar and talked a lot. Why did I make the meeting this time was one of my friends was gonna leave for Koube in a few days. Even though the originally reason was that, the topic we talked about was about another girl's relationship. She'd been going out with her boyfriend for 5 years, but broke up. The reason was his cheating.

I know that starting of becoming a working member of society is something stressful. But still, his say was so bad. He started becoming close to a girl in his company, and took his stress out on my friend! Maybe the changing of lifestyle was so stressful for him. But he couldn't do anything bad to the other girl since they're not so close yet. He blamed his girlfriend; he said she was bad since she didn't take care of him, and broke up with her. However, he kept visiting the both girl's apartments and stayed there. My friend loved him so much, so she wanted him to be beside her, but she told him to decide which girl. It didn't have to be her, but she just wanted him to make it clear.

Finally, she was about to get depression. She even went to the doctor. She finally decided not to keep in touch with him, and brought his clothes she had in her apartment to his home. She said thank you and bye to him, and told she is getting close to a guy. You know what he said? He said, "so, you're gonna leave me" and then, he hit her with saying "don't care about such a guy!" How dare he said such things! It's really terrible. Guys shouldn't hit girls no matter what. I thought that she was the first one to get married among us, but such a thing happened...I really hope that my friend can find a better one soon :(

Heart Broken (3)

I couldn't forget about my 2nd boyfriend for a while since the reason he left me was kind a thing that I couldn't accept. After a while, I tried to like my 1st boyfriend since he asked me out again. I tried to like him but...couldn't. One good thing was, I really hated my 1st boyfriend after breaking up since I could only remember cruel attitude of him, but when I went out with him next time, he was so caring. He told me he regreted the things he did after breaking up. Now, we two are good friends; he knows almost everything about me, so he knows how I feel if something happens.

After one year and several months later, I got my next boyfriend. He was 2 years younger than me and he looked like he liked me very much...I might be kind a person that can't beat high-pressured selling about boyfriend, lol. Anyway, I started going out with him but the relationship ended in the most horrible way.

To tell the truth, I'm not good at caring for my boyfriend. I'm the one who always make them mad. I don't like altering my opinion, I don't hesitate telling them anything what I think and I even deny them sometimes. I know most guys want to be confident but I can't stop it. Because of that, even though they liked me a lot in the begining, it is me that always left. I don't think they didn't do any bad things, but also sure I wasn't nice too..To be frank, I was left by my boyfriend. He started two-timing me, and I was the loser...

My Favorite Humour

I like stupid things that smart people do. Since they know a lot of things, their humour are much much more interesting than other normal people do. Even just talking to them is enjoyable. They have vocabulary and they sometimes express themselves in the ways we don't use generally. I might be kind a weird person. I don't watch TV so much. One reason for that, is I don't like Japanese variety show programs that are popular in general. I don't think it's fun. For example, there is a program that is on the air on weekdays lunch time. Its name is "笑っていいとも(waratte iitomo)" It seems like people in my workplace like the program because they are always watching it during lunch, but I don't really know what is fun. It looks like they are doing something just suddenly, and most of them look silly. As my opinion, real entertainments are based on consideration. For example, it must be the interval that they dare make what people makes laugh is, but not the interval that happens by chance because of the miss they make. It's hard to explain in English for me, so I want to show something what kind of humour I like.

This ship is made of LEGO. And it took a long time to complete. If you just take a look, it looks great. But it even moves! It might be not so complicated techniques that are used for the ship, but I think that idea is great. If I make that big ship with LEGO, maybe I don't think of making it movable...so, I was very impressed. Who thought of such a stupid unuseful thing? lol. Actually it was made by students of The University of Tokyo; the best university in Japan. It's the fruit of their humour. I don't think they could make this stuff if they were students of a much lower level university..(I'm sorry). Anyway, what I wanted to say was...I love silly things which include humour and intelligence.

Gonna Visit Singapore Next Month!

I booked the trip the other day, and planning where to go now. It's more than a year since I went abroad last time, and I'm so excited visiting there :D Why did I choose the place was since I couldn't get many days off, so it had to be a place that is not so far from here. Then, why not in Japan? It's just because I wanna go somewhere out of Japan. Korea was fine too. But I dare chose Singapore because the fuel surcharge went down. So I thought it was better to go somewhere far during this time. Even though the fuel goes up, the fuel price for Korea won't be as much different as that of for Singapore.

Another reason is, we have friends there. I got a Singaporean friend before, and got close to him via chatting. And my sister and I met him and his family when he visited Japan. We really enjoyed it! To tell the truth, I didn't know about Singapore more than what I learned at school in old days, but I got interested in that country enough to feel I wanna visit :) Actually Singapore has been the country I wanted to visit the most in Asia these days. And the nicest thing is, they told me they would take days off and show us around!! I'm so glad :D~ Hope that the plan goes well. But beforehand, I have to complete making my plans till the days come :P

God Like Hands

Don't you feel good when you're washed your head at hair salons? Of course I do. But it's rare that I get a hair wash in such places since it would cost some money :S I only get it when I dye my hair.

I've read one of my friend's posts on mixi, and she said there, that she always get a hair wash by her bf when they go to a hotel (she is kind a strange person since she writes such a thing). I thought it was nice. Her bf isn't a stylist, just a normal guy. He wasn't good at washing her long hair before, but since he kept doing that, he got better. What if I train mine like that? lol. He would be a shampoo man under exclusive contract to me!! But I wouldn't let him be just it. Have to train him as my good massager since I have stiff shoulders and I'm letting my brother massage my shoulders, legs, feet etc. sometimes. Have to make sure I can get such service in the future too, so I want to get such "god like hands" for me lol. Of course, it won't be free. I'll do it back to him like I'm doing it to my brother as well :P

Heart Broken (2)

I didn't cry after the heart broke. I just started listening to some songs that he recommended to me. It was just a bargaining point that I received his offer when I borrowed the songs from him. I used to go to the same high school he went to, but we haven't been in the same class. Where we got close was in a private school. He was my friend's boyfriend. I used to like to let my friends listen to my favorite songs. So, I let him listen to my favorite songs as well, and borrowed his CDs as well. After a while, I liked an artist group; 19. They were making songs that made me feel calm, and I felt sympathy. I set one of their songs as the ring tone from him, and was restlessly waiting for his emails. However my heart broke, I couldn't change the ring tone for a while.

I got my next boyfriend after I entered Uni next year. He looked cute, and I didn't care about going out with him however I was a little bit taller than him. He was so sweet to me, and I'd never experienced being taken in that sweet way before, since if I remembered about my first boyfriend, usually terrible memories came up. I thought I learnt how to depend upon my boyfriend's benevolence with my second, since I didn't know it when I was with my first. But our relationship didn't last long; we broke up next year. It lasted only for 9 months.

My April

It was a happy story, until I noticed that two of them were labelled as "work".

It's a fresh month...but actually not fresh for me since our lab didn't get any new faces. When the schedule for April came out at the end of March, I thought it looked like I would have a lot of off days. I felt like that because I have two full shifts on Saturday and Sunday respectively, so the days off on the weekdays are just compensatory days off. Plus, I don't have anything scheduled on weekends like before, so the word "work" is sadly standing out on my weekend spaces.

I don't dislike weekend shifts. About Saturdays, our lab usually has half a day off, so it isn't that different compared to weekday shifts. And about Sundays, I stay alone there so I feel easy as long as it's not busy. But this time it's a little bit sad. I would have to miss a drinking meeting with my Uni friends because of it, and I don't have ANY plans on my weekdays off :( I don't say I'm a person who is always free and available, but having a whole day without doing anything is sad. Especially on weekdays, it's absolutely hard to get any friends that are available. For instance, one of my closest friends is a teacher, so she can't get weekdays off. She even told me she would have to schedule her honeymoon during summer vacation or something if she gets married.

Perhaps I feel something is missing because I'm not living a full life now :( "If, if, if.." there are a lot of "if's" when imagining about my full life, but they're not active now. Anyway, it'll be one of the ways I start filling up my red days in my schedule book. Want to make my off days better, although I don't have plans now :P

Heart Broken (1)

Losing the love of your life is painful. Especially the gf or bf, that you've been going out with for a long time leave you. I'm always the girl that can't get anyone that I want. My first relationship was a mutual one; we both liked each other. But that's it. I'd gone out with him for 2.5 years and finally broke up with him. The reason was I couldn't stand him anymore. He used to blame me a lot. He never said sorry, but always found excuses and critisized me. I liked him so much maybe for an year or so, but after that, I was always crying.

One of the memories I can't forget is a new years day. We had a promise to go to a temple together near his house. It's common to go to such places on new years, so we decided to go there. However, when we met at my nearest station and were about to move there, he started saying he wouldn't go. The reason was, he didn't want to meet his friends with me. There supposed to be a lot of his junior highschool friends there, and he started blaming me like, why do you wanna go there, do you want me to show you off, something like that. I didn't understand why he started saying such a thing. I didn't even think of such a thing. So I started crying, and in the end, we didn't go anywhere.

Around that time, I noticed that I started liking another guy that asked me to go out before. My boyfriend's cruel behavior helped my feelings too. When I finally couldn't deny my feelings for the guy, I said good bye to my boyfriend. I knew that the guy didn't like me anymore, but felt that I couldn't go on like this, I had to tell him my feelings. Since I didn't wanna keep the insurance, I broke up with my bf firstly and told my feelings to the guy on the same day.

I have my theory about love. As my mind, if I want to tell someone that I like him, I want to tell it in person. In the evening, I called him and went to a park. It was a cold day as the end of May. We sat on a bench and I told him that I liked him. He told me that he had some theory about love, and asked me if I wanted to hear the answer or not. I was so scared to hear that, but after a while, I told him I wanted to hear and my heart broke at that time. When we were walking back to the station, I said, "please keep being my friend". It was funny since the words were as same as what he said when I rejected his love.

Cherry-blossom Viewing

I had a promise to have a dinner with my Uni friend yesterday. Since it's during Sakura season, we went to Inogashira park to see Sakura flowers. Since it was Saturday and the weather was not bad, there were a lot of people. They spread blue seats and were eating and drinking on them. I saw a lot of foreigners too! I felt it was nice that they were enjoying together :)

After walking around a pond in the park, my friend and me went to an izakaya restaurant to have dinner. We talked a lot about our recent things...job, friend, money, love, etc. She told me that she met her old friend again on mixi, and gonna meet him in person soon. We enjoyed the dinner.

When it passed 10 o'clock, we went to the park again to see cherry-blossom's night view. The park wasn't crowded anymore. And the pond, where were a lot of swan boats in daytime, was silent. The water looked like a mirror and was reflecting lights and flowers. It was so pretty. We saw some couples sitting on the bench beside the pond and enjoying their time. Felt a little bit envy...lol. Anyway, the Sakura flowers were really nice, but there was a sad thing too. At night, we saw a lot of garbage people left around there. The park is not yours, but everyone's. Bringing your garbage at home is of course. You should clean things that you messed up when you leave. I'm sure you will feel uncomfortable if you come to enjoy with friends, but see garage around there. If the situation is too bad, they might not permit you to view cherry-blossom like now anymore in the future because of a few people who don't have morality. Let's keep the park clean and keep enjoying viewing flowers every year :D